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prettier and younger
but not any better off
bandom: dunder mifflin: chicago branch | various pairings; pg-13 
7th-Aug-2008 12:26 am
(misc) blast it out
Dunder Mifflin: Chicago Branch
Various pairings || PG-13 || 5000ish words
By: offtheceiling & iamtheenemy

Patrick is always the one who adds in the (to the), because that’s his title, dammit. He’s Pete’s assistant and Pete could not actually do his job without Patrick there. “My very own Ugly Betty!” Pete will say, fluttering his eyelashes at Patrick. “Except not ugly, or a girl. You can be Hot Patrick instead. Chat fic. Rough, unbetaed.

Pete’s the regional manager, and the first thing he does when he gets promoted is hire Patrick as the assistant (to the) regional manager. He holds interviews for three days before Patrick comes in. Patrick starts talking, and Pete hires him on the spot. As far as Pete’s concerned, it’s fucking destiny. Patrick is perfect.

Patrick is always the one who adds in the (to the), because that’s his title, dammit. He’s Pete’s assistant and Pete could not actually do his job without Patrick there. “My very own Ugly Betty!” Pete will say, fluttering his eyelashes at Patrick. “Except not ugly, or a girl. You can be Hot Patrick instead.”

He follows Patrick around constantly.

"Patrick, where did I put those reports?” “Patrick, what time is my
meeting?” “Patrick, where are we going for lunch?"

When Patrick makes the mistake of singing along to the radio in the break room during lunch? Forget it. It's all over. Pete institutes karaoke Friday, starting immediately.

“Dunder Mifflin, Ryan speaking. How may I help you?”

Ryan has redefined what it means to be a bored receptionist. He sits on the computer all day, surfing MySpace and shopping online. He puts calls on hold so he can finish his manicure.

Brendon’s in accounting, and he’s full of energy. Pete gave him keys to the building a week after he hired him, because Brendon kept showing up half an hour before even the maintenance guys. He’s been crazy about Ryan since the first time they met, and spends the majority of his time trying to impress him and making him laugh.

Ryan pretends to be annoyed by it, but he secretly loves it. Well, it’s secret to everyone except Spencer, who loves to mock him about it.

On the rare days when Brendon calls in sick, Ryan is lost. His voice goes even more monotonous and he doesn’t bother giving anyone their messages. Spencer just laughs and laughs. He’s lucky that he’s Ryan’s best friend and that Ryan would probably actually miss him if he died, otherwise, well. The office would be missing a salesperson.


Gabe, William, Travis and the Butcher work in the warehouse. Though “work” may be a bit strong a term. Mostly they sit around in William’s office and watch television – they’re currently addicted to As The World Turns -- until Patrick comes to check on them. Then they are Hard At Work. Everyone except William, who is DELICATE, thanks, and just deals with the paperwork.

The other three humor William by doing what he says, for the most part. Gabe and the Butcher do it because William is a bitch when he wants to be. Travis does it because William gives fucking phenomenal head.


Vicky-T is one of the few saleswomen at the Chicago branch of Dunder Mifflin. She’s been working there for about a year. Originally, Pete hired her because she was a friend of Gabe’s. Pete’s a nice dude like that.

She spends half of her time in the back smoking and the other half flirting with Patrick. She thinks he’s pretty much the most adorable thing in the tri-state area and is particularly fond of making him blush. Especially when Pete is watching.

Pete is SO NOT IMPRESSED, but he hasn’t come up with an excuse to fire her yet. She always makes her monthly quota, and has a Rolodex full of loyal clients that she brought with her from her last job. Pete suspects she’s using phone sex to sell paper, but he can’t prove it.


Once, Pete has a shitty week. Like, a really, really shitty week. Corporate comes down hard on his ass, and he ends up having to fire Brent. The dude was dead weight, hadn’t met his quota in the past five months, but Pete still hated to deal with that shit. Plus, they’d gone out drinking a few times, with other people in the office, and Brent was a decent guy.

Whatever. Pete’s had a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad week, and then when he comes into work on Thursday morning there’s a CD propped up on his desk, against an empty coffee mug. There’s no writing on it or anything, so he’s curious.

When he loads it on his computer the title is “for pete,” and it turns out to be a whole disc full of Patrick singing Pete’s favorite songs accompanied by an acoustic guitar.

Pete is so crazy about him it HURTS. A real, physical ache that starts in his throat and spreads all the way to his toes.

Anyway, the rest of the week isn’t so bad.


Jon gets hired in place of Brent, and he’s super awesome. Even Ryan likes him. And Ryan hates everyone who isn’t named Spencer.

Spencer, though? Spencer really likes Jon Walker. He likes his smile and his floppy hair and the way he laughs. But he thinks Jon would never go for him, because Jon could have anyone. Everyone loves Jon. He’s, like, universally adored, from Pete on down to the night security guard whose name Spencer didn’t know until Jon greeted him all, “Hey, Evan!” sometime during his first month.

The thing is, Spencer’s quiet. He’s not shy, he just usually can’t be bothered to socialize with anyone other than Ryan and Brendon (by default, because where goes Ryan, so goes Brendon). Now he thinks that Jon sees him as the weird kid in the back of the room who never talks. Spencer wants to change that, really he does, but every time he tries to talk to Jon, he just ends up stammering something about ordering more printer ink and fleeing back to his desk.

Ryan is thrilled with this development. For two years it’s been day after day of Spencer smirking at Ryan behind Brendon’s back. It’s been so good having some ammunition against Spencer for once.


Andy passes out PETA petitions and marks his lunches DO NOT EAT in bright red Sharpie, even though the only other person in the office that would possibly be interested in eating his weirdo vegan food is Frank.

Joe smokes up in the bathroom and in the warehouse with Gabe and Travie at least once a day. He and Andy bicker constantly about animal cruelty and Joe’s terrible hamburger-and-hash dependency, but they’re totally friends. Joe has known Andy and Pete since forever.


Gerard sits in the corner and keeps to himself. No one’s ever seen him so much as pick up a phone. He just draws all day. Somehow, though, he manages to have, like, these awesome figures every month, much to the bafflement of Pete and his co-workers.

His secret, which no one knows, is that people find it very hard to say no to Gerard, especially over the phone where they can’t see his long, slightly greasy hair and crooked tie. He’s very earnest, and people end up feeling better about themselves when they agree to buy paper from Gerard. Consequently he doesn’t have to work as hard as everyone else.

Gerard gets hit on a lot while doing cold calls. He’s getting better about not freaking out and hanging up as soon as someone asks for his home phone number, just in case of a paper emergency.

Mikey works in the office too. He’s actually the one who got Gerard the job. At first Gerard hated it, because he went to art school so that he wouldn’t have to work in an office, for god’s sake. He quickly changes his mind when he realizes that he can make sales easy and spend the rest of his time working on his comics. Besides, it’s not like that whole starving artist thing was really working out for him.

Also, a few months after Gerard starts at Dunder Mifflin, Frank Iero transfers from St. Louis. Suddenly coming into work didn’t seem like such a hassle. In fact, it’s kind of awesome.

He’s been getting a lot less work done since Frank started, though. Not Dunder Mifflin work, that shit’s easy, but work on his comic. He spends most of his time sketching Frank doing all the crazy, stupid shit he does like, “WATCH, WATCH, I CAN JUMP OFF MY DESK, DO A FLIP AND LAND ON MY FEET!”

He’s so focused on his sketching and pretending not to be watching -- totally not watching -- that he doesn’t notice every time Frank turns to look at Gerard after he lands his dismount. See, see?


You would think that the red Sharpie and the suspect smell of Andy’s lunches would be enough of a warning to stay away, but well. One day Brendon eats some of it TOTALLY BY ACCIDENT, and he’s like, “Oh my god, oh my god, what the fuck, what the fuck, this is not my sandwich!”

Then he declares that he is, “DYING, JUST DYING, RYAN!” And the only thing that will cure him is if Ryan buys him a milkshake. A chocolate one.

Spencer laughs while Ryan pretends to be reluctant about going, until Ryan says, “Hey, Jon, could you sit with Spencer at lunch? I’m taking Brendon to McDonalds.” Then Spencer goes bright red and Ryan’s the one laughing.

Jon says, “Yeah, sure.”

Ryan waggles his eyebrows suggestively at Spencer a few times before leaving with Brendon. Spencer mentally swears revenge. Or would, if he wasn’t suddenly sitting two feet away from Jon, because that means his brain has pretty much stopped functioning.


Sometimes, when Brendon’s had too much coffee, or is in a really good mood, he joins in whatever scheme Frank cooks up. Those times are the funniest, because then Ryan and Gerard are staring at Frank and Brendon like lovelorn teenage girls, chins in their hands. Gerard is especially pathetic because he can’t actually bring himself to talk to Frank. At least Ryan has mastered the art of rolling his eyes and calling Brendon an idiot.

Meanwhile, Spencer watches the whole thing and is like, “Oh my god, I thought I graduated from high school.” Then Ryan and Gerard sigh in unison and apparently, no, he has not graduated from high school.

On one such day, Jon actually brings popcorn, made fresh in the break room, to Spencer’s desk. They eat it together and make commentary on Frank and Brendon being stupid and Gerard and Ryan being stupid in love. Actual popcorn! As if it was possible for Spencer to be more into him. GOD.


Bob Bryar works in the corner opposite Gerard. He tries to keep to himself, but his co-workers are always coming to sit on the edge of his desk and tell him their PROBLEMS. He tries being surly and non-responsive, but no one believes him.

He’s Patrick’s roommate, which means Pete is always coming up to him and being like, “Does Patrick like red better or green?” “Does Patrick like vanilla or chocolate?” Bob tries to point out that he’s trying to, you know, do the job Pete hired him for, but Pete doesn’t seem to care.

Bob’s the go-to advice guy in the office because he’s the one that’s got all his shit together. He’s been with Greta in accounting for almost two years. Brendon constantly asks him for tips on how to impress Ryan. Bob wants to blow him off, but Greta thinks Brendon is precious. So Bob tries.

Greta and Brendon are good friends. They sit in the accounting corner all day talking about boys. She thinks he could do better than Ryan Ross, but doesn’t tell him. She just really hopes Ryan proves her wrong.

Bob and Vicky-T take a lot of smoke breaks together. Bob will say, “How did I end up in the Big Gay Office?” and Vicky-T will say, “Tell me about it.”


Gerard’s brother, Mikey, is Pete’s ex. They used to date before Pete got promoted, and Patrick is weirdly, potently jealous and snippy with Mikey.

Mikey never says anything, he just stares, expressionless until Patrick flushes and apologizes.

Then Mikey takes pity on him and is like, "You know it's so completely over, right? Between me and Pete?"

Patrick says, "Um, um, I don't...okay?"

Mikey shrugs. “Just saying."

Pete and Mikey are still friends, though, and Pete wants Mikey and Patrick to hang out too. He doesn't understand why Patrick doesn't like Mikey. Mikey is awesome! Poor Mikey, stuck as matchmaker, has to be like, "Pete, he likes you."

Pete's like, "Wait, what?"

Mikey has to leave and find a wall to bang his head against.

When Pete does get it, it's like Pete x 100. He's around Patrick constantly. Like, even more than before, somehow.

“Mikey was one thing, and it was great. But you’re something else. You’re Patrick.”

And even if Patrick maybe doesn’t understand what Pete means, the sentiment is there.


When Ryan is, occasionally, too mean to Brendon, it’s Greta that comes down. She might be little and sweet, but she can kick Ryan’s skinny ass if she has to, and tells him so. Ryan is a little afraid of her, even if he’d never admit it.

He tries to look bored when she bitches at him, but he always feels terrible. The thing is, he doesn’t ever hurt Brendon’s feelings on purpose. Just, look, his best friend is Spencer Smith, for god’s sake. All of Ryan’s worst remarks roll right off his back, and it only takes one of his bitchfaces to let Ryan know when he’s gone too far.

Brendon doesn’t have a bitchface though. He just gets kind of quiet and goes away, leaving Ryan wondering, “What did I do?” He usually apologizes by buying Brendon cupcakes.

The worst is when he insults Brendon on a Friday (honestly, who knew he’d be so sensitive about his shoes?), and Brendon sneaks out half an hour early, before Ryan can gather the nerve to talk to him.

Ryan spends the whole weekend feeling guilty and shitty. Spencer totally does not help. He talks about Jon the whole time and refuses to call Brendon to come hang out at the bar with them, because, “you have to clean up your own messes, Ryan.”

On Monday, Ryan’s there early and waiting on Brendon, but Greta gets there first. Ryan barely contains his wince upon seeing her. He thought he had it planned so perfectly, because Brendon’s always the first one in. He makes the first pot of coffee every morning. Ryan knows, because there’s always a cup waiting on his desk when he arrives.

Brendon’s right out in the parking lot, though. Greta caught him on the way in and was all, “No. Me first.” Now he’s standing back, awkwardly fiddling with his scarf and trying not to look at Ryan. Ryan’s wearing the brown shirt Brendon compliments him on every time, without fail, because hey, every little bit helps. So, you know, it’s hard for him not to look at Ryan. But if he does then Greta will glare at him, and she’s scary! Also, Bob Bryar does her bidding, which is a double threat.

Greta talks to Ryan – real low so Brendon can’t hear what's being said. Ryan nods a lot and looks scared. When Greta finally goes in, Brendon tries to follow her, tries to maneuver around Ryan. But Ryan’s like, “Hey, can we…can we talk?”

Brendon agrees, only because Ryan’s acting so strangely that he can’t not agree. And because Brendon is stupidly, helplessly in love with him.

Brendon bargains for a movie night where he gets to pick the movie and three chocolate cupcakes with chocolate frosting, and then lets Ryan back into his good graces.


Mikey plays matchmaker again when he “accidentally” leaves Gerard’s comic on the table in the break room right before Frank sits down to eat lunch. This leads to Gerard and Frank talking about comics every day. Gerard used to leave for lunch every other day to hang out with his friend Ray, but he stops.

One day, Frank tries leaping from his desk onto Jon’s. He misses and ends up cracking his head on the edge of Jon’s desk.

Gerard freaks the fuck out.

Everyone else in the office is shocked, because they’ve never ever heard this dude talk before, and suddenly he’s shouting all these orders.

Frank’s like, “Dude, dude, Gerard, I’m fine.”

Gerard says, “No, no, you have a concussion. No, don’t close your eyes!” He’s kneeling over Frank and parting Frank’s shaggy brown hair gently, looking for blood. “You need to go to the hospital!”

Frank argues against this but agrees when Gerard insists on driving him. He smiles the whole trip in Gerard’s beat up Ford.

The doctor tells Frank he’s fine, which is no surprise to Frank. He knows he has a hard head.

The next day, Frank comes into work and sees a piece of paper on his desk. He turns it around, and it’s him. As a SUPERHERO. He’s got, like, guns and a badass cape and shit. He’s taking out these vampire zombie things with a huge machete. In the background, Gerard’s there, his loyal sidekick.

It’s the coolest thing he’s ever seen in his life.

He’s about to get up and maybe make an idiot out of himself, when skinny little Mikey Way appears next to his desk. It’s the requisite “hurt my brother and die” speech, though Mikey’s maybe not as vehement as he might otherwise be, because he thinks Frank’s a good guy.

When Frank goes to talk to Gerard, he puts the picture down on Gerard’s desk. Gerard turns bright red. It’s fucking adorable.

Frank says, “There’s only one thing wrong with this picture. For the last year, I’ve been doing the stupidest shit possible to try and get your attention. It’s ridiculous the stuff I’ve done just to get you to look at me. I was jealous of a sketchbook, for god’s sake. You are definitely not the sidekick in this relationship.”


Over the next couple of months, Jon and Spencer talk on the phone a lot. Every night, pretty much. One night, Jon innocently mentions something about an ex-girlfriend.

Spencer’s like, “…GIRLfriend?”

He gets upset, because he’s obviously read the signs wrong. He’s been wasting his time with a straight guy this whole time. It sucks. A lot. In order to not get any more invested than he already is, Spencer stops hanging out with Jon.

This makes Jon really sad and confused. He doesn’t know what he did wrong! He ends up spending a lot of time perched on the edge of Bob’s desk.

Spencer spends days being quietly heartbroken. He won’t even talk to Ryan about it, except to give the barest of details. Ryan is exasperated because Spencer is supposed to be the one sorting Ryan out. Not the other way around.

Brendon goes into overdrive trying to be helpful. He brings Spencer and Jon coffee and gets them to smile by telling stupid jokes. It’s stupid and adorable and makes Ryan fall for him even more than he already has, which is just one more reason to be annoyed with the whole situation.


Pete makes Patrick take bets about who sorts their shit out first and when. Even the warehouse guys are in on it, because Jon Walker is friends with everyone.

It takes Ryan having a little talk with Jon to clear things up. It’s Ryan, so the conversation is blunt and very to the point.

“So, what’s this about a girlfriend?”


Ryan rolls his eyes. “Look, Spencer’s really cautious. He’s not going to let himself fall for a straight guy.”

Jon’s eyes go all wide and he stutters, “Wait, what? I’m not, I mean…I like guys too.” He has no clue when this got so out of control, but something obviously needs to be done.

“Hmmm,” Ryan says sarcastically, “Maybe you should tell Spencer that.” The tone kind of implies RIGHT NOW, with a hint of GROVELING IS IN ORDER.

So Jon kind of sheepishly shuffles up to Spencer’s desk and says, “Can we, um, talk?”

Spencer is wary but he agrees, and everyone is watching them. They kick Pete out of his office and close the blinds for privacy.

Jon looks at Spencer and blurts out, “I like boys.”

Spencer stares at him, not impressed. Jon sighs. “I mean, there was…an ex-girlfriend, yeah, but I mean. I like you,” and then, after a beat, “a lot.”

Spencer’s hands are sweating, but he’s smiling. One of his big, bright smiles, with his head dipped and his hair falling over his eyes. He’s totally blushing, but he doesn’t care. Then Jon is kissing him and he cares even less.

Jon is frantic. He can’t keep his hands off of Spencer. He’s so fucking giddy and so relieved and his heart feels like it’s going to beat out of his chest.

Pete ruins the moment by pounding on the door and yelling, “IF YOU'RE GONNA HAVE SEX ON MY DESK I GET TO WATCH.”

In the background, Patrick groans, “Oh my god, how have you not gotten sued yet?”

Pete says, “Because I have you to sweet talk people out of it.”

Jon and Spencer come out, all messed up hair and pushed around clothes. Everyone starts hollering and catcalling, except for Vicky-T, who had next week in the betting pool, goddamnit.

Brendon sidles over to Ryan and takes his hand. Ryan completely does not blush. It’s just a little warm in the office, that’s all.

Bob’s cheering because he’s just relieved that he won’t have to fucking hear about it anymore.

Gerard and Frank missed the whole thing, because they were making out in the bathroom. They come in when everyone’s calmed down, and Frank’s like, “WHAT DID I MISS?”

Spencer ducks his head and says, “Nothing. Shut up.” Jon just grins.


Karaoke Fridays become a hit, mostly because Frank and Greta get really into it.

Patrick insists on singing R. Kelly. Pete’s like, “Okay, that’s great. But, here, sing something sexy!”

Most of the time Patrick rolls his eyes and ignores him.

After a couple of drinks, though, Patrick can be convinced to sing Prince. Pete’s maybe regretting instituting Karaoke Fridays then, because wow. That is not something that other people (Vicky-T) should get to see. It should be ALL FOR HIM.

He’s like, “Patrick, come home with me and we can have private karaoke.”

Patrick’s like, “Wow, that was so creepy.” But he’s not saying no. It’s not yes, but it’s not no.

Patrick drunk has much less inhibitions, which is fantastic for Pete (and the reason why he always keeps a bottle of vodka in his desk just in case), but it also means Pete has to find reasons to get Vicky-T out of the office on Fridays.

“Um, Vicky-T, there is a paper emergency!.”

She’s not having it, because Patrick singing sexy songs is not to be missed. Plus, Patrick maybe likes seeing Pete get jealous.

So she’ll go, and Pete will be like, “VICTORY!” but she always gets back just as the karaoke starts. And he’s all, “DAMMIT, FOILED AGAIN.”

The worst comes when Pete discovers that she can sing too, when she and Patrick do a duet. Pete is Not. Amused, but Ryan is there to pat him consolingly, if also mockingly, on the shoulder.

Pete and Ryan are still standing together when Brendon gets up and sings a song to Ryan.

And, like, he sings random bits of songs all the time around the office, choruses of Top 40 pop and bridges of old rock songs, so Ryan knew he could sing, but. A rendition of “Umbrella,” no matter how enthusiastic, generally doesn’t involve Brendon running his hand up his shirt. Or shaking his hips. Or licking his lips. Ryan maybe has a thing about Brendon’s lips, and his hands, God.

He’s singing, “Pour Some Sugar On Me,” and it’s Pete’s turn to do some friendly patting. Much less mocking though, because Pete’s totally a nice guy, and also he feels Ryan’s pain.

Ryan can’t talk. His tongue feels too big for his mouth, and his eyes feel too big for his head. His throat is completely dry. Pete’s mood improves somewhat at the hilarity of seeing Ryan Ross so tongue-tied. He thinks he should probably be getting this on tape.

Patrick is standing across the room talking to Vicky-T, though, like Pete isn’t even there. But, you know, if Patrick wants to play this game, Mikey is still here. Pete goes and drapes himself over a confused Mikey who is like, “Ugh, what?” and tries to shrug him off. Luckily, Pete is a strong motherfucker.

It totally works. Patrick is back at Pete’s side (where he’s supposed to be!) in a gratifyingly short amount of time. Pete gets to shoot smug looks at Vicky-T while snuggling into Patrick. Patrick just rolls his eyes and wraps his hand around the back of Pete’s neck, his fingers stroking the soft skin behind Pete’s ear.

Vicky-T rolls her eyes too, because she’s totally going home with Alex, just like every other night of the week, but she likes fucking with Pete. It’s so easy. Patrick really is pretty awesome, even if he is clearly in love with Pete.

Alex is way more awesome, in Vicky-T’s opinion. He does this thing with his tongue, and is down for the occasional threesome with Gabe. She might complain about the gayness of the office, but it definitely works to her advantage.


Brendon, meanwhile, is excited, because he's totally found Ryan's Achilles' heel. And, unlike Patrick with Pete, he is more than willing to use it to his advantage.

Over and over.

Ryan is very glad to have his big receptionist desk to hide behind. It makes it easier to seem disinterested. Even when Brendon is shamelessly wiggling his hips as he offers Ryan more coffee and says, “You've been typing all day. Here, let me give you a hand
massage. I'm really good at them."

Ryan hasn't so much been typing as he has been looking at scarves online, but whatever. He’s helpless against that kind of temptation.

Spencer is giving him that stupid knowing grin he's been shooting at Ryan ever since Spencer and Jon hooked up and Spencer became insufferable. Ryan reminds himself of the best friend thing again and how he really can’t kill Spencer. Plus, Jon would probably cry, and no one wants to see Jon cry.

It’s just that suddenly Brendon is making Ryan nervous, in a way he's never been before. Brendon used to just be this sweet guy, but now he's constantly in Ryan’s space. Constantly there. And he seems more and more confident the more Ryan fumbles.

Ryan is always in control, but Brendon throws him off kilter. Well, he always has, but now Brendon knows it.

Ryan bitches and bitches to Spencer until Spencer rolls his eyes and says, “God, then shut the fuck up and do something about it.”


So Ryan does. After all, he is Ryan fucking Ross and he’ll be damned if he lets Brendon out-seduce him. He starts looking at Brendon from under his lashes and smiling at him and touching his hand every time Brendon comes to get his messages or bring Ryan more coffee.

Brendon’s reaction is mostly along the lines of “Holy shit.”

Jon’s like, “Wow, Ross is really bringing his A game,” and Spencer nods and says, “This shit is gold.”


Pete starts another betting pool.


This time, Vicky-T is going to win. She devises a plan and lets Brendon in on it, which is probably cheating, but what the fuck ever. She lost fifty bucks last time.

The plan is this: If Brendon will just grab Ryan and kiss him on the day Vicky-T chooses then she will totally do whatever he wants. Within reason.

It’s not like Brendon is hard to convince.

She picks a Karaoke Friday, because Ryan will already be at a disadvantage. Just the idea of Brendon singing makes him fidgety.

Brendon wears his tightest jeans and spends the whole day near Ryan, touching him and leaning close to talk. By the time 5pm rolls around, Ryan's been half-hard for hours.

And then Brendon sings. He’s intense, and his eyes are dark, and Ryan cannot look away. He’s glued to his seat. Hypnotized. More turned on than he’s even been in his life.

The song ends with Brendon in Ryan’s lap, sweaty, flushed, and grinning. Everyone is staring, of course, and Brendon is showing off. This is his moment. He leans in, kisses Ryan full on the mouth, and everyone in the room inhales in unison.

Ryan's hands flex, and there's a moment of, "is he going to push him away?" before Ryan fists his hands into the back of Brendon's shirt and surges forward.

Pete is the only one who bursts into applause this time. No one else can look away from Ryan and Brendon long enough to bother.

Well, except Spencer. There are some things a best friend should never have to see. Luckily, he has Jon’s neck right there to hide his face in.

Greta is beaming and clutching Bob’s hand. Maybe Ryan Ross deserves a chance, after all.

Frank and Gerard slip back into the room five minutes later, fresh from making out in the break room. Frank takes one look at Brendon and Ryan and frowns. “We missed the good shit again, didn’t we?”

Patrick catches Pete eyeing him and shakes his head. “No. Do not even think about it.” Unfortunately for Patrick, Pete has some fucking awesome puppy eyes. Patrick wavers.

He figures that maybe no one will notice if he lets Pete kiss him right there, because they're all still focused on Brendon and Ryan.

And, seriously, Patrick is going to have to get maintenance to bleach that chair. Twice.

Well, if Mikey noticed Pete kissing him, Patrick would be okay with that. If he’s gonna do this, it’s gonna be fucking worth it. He nudges Pete over a little, right into Mikey’s eyeline, and says “Okay, just a little.”

Except that, by then, everyone is a little bored with Brendon and Ryan and they’re all looking for a new source of entertainment. It’s worth having everyone watching them, though, to see Pete smile all big and somehow endearingly lecherous. Then Pete is kissing him like Patrick is the only thing he’s ever wanted and Patrick pretty much forgets about everyone else.

Frank whoops and almost elbows Gerard in the head. Everyone else just rolls their eyes. It’s not like they haven’t seen this coming.

Frank did, too. But at least he didn’t miss it this time!


Basically, Karaoke Fridays were the best idea ever.

Pete’s thinking of suggesting them to corporate.
30th-Aug-2009 08:31 pm (UTC)
I was going through my old recs for broken links and wondering if you're going to move this one here too?
20th-Sep-2009 09:28 pm (UTC)
yes! i just did! sorry it took forever.
21st-Sep-2009 12:54 pm (UTC)
Thank you!
11th-Sep-2009 10:18 pm (UTC)
I'd love to read this fic and was wondering whether you still add people?
20th-Sep-2009 09:28 pm (UTC)
you can read it at this entry now! thanks!
9th-Jan-2012 04:00 am (UTC)
Wonderful fic darling. ( I adore Not!fics so much.)
Mind if i rec you on my tumblr www.thatonedeadgirl.tumblr.com ?
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